Toe Blog

Right after I started this blog, I went with my parents to Cedar City. My mom hurt her toe and all through the trip she was very fond of updating us on her toe situtation. She told me that if she had a blog, it would be about her toe, and she started referring to her verbal updates as her toe blog. I'd get up in the morning and she'd say, "Toe blog: my toe looks black and blue, but I don't think the toenail will fall off" or "Toe blog: I wrapped my toe back up and I think I can wear tennis shoes today."

So, last night I had my own toe blog experience. I was getting ready to go out, and I was just about to put on my boot when two of my toes cramped up. They were not in normal toe positions. Very unpleasant. Very painful. I sat down on the floor and I explained to my toes that we were a team and needed to work together and that I didn't relish being lame at the age of 29.

I considered the treatment options available in the four minutes I had available before my ride arrived. I remembered that foot cramps come from a Vitamin E deficiency sometimes. Or was it Vitamin D? Potassium? I couldn't remember, but I hobbled into my kitchen and dug out the mulitvitamins I've ignored for the last year and took one, hoping that the appropriate vitamin would be immediately dispatched to my toes. (I knew that ice cream and hash browns for dinnner was a bad idea!) Then I opened the refrigerator and pulled out the healthiest looking thing I could find--a red pepper. Lots of vitamins, yes? I ate it.

And then I had a sudden, miraculous recovery. The Miracle of Science. I'm going to write to the Mayo Clinic and tell them all about it. Those multivitamins are amazing.

Toe blog: all toes are functioning properly.