11 December 2007

Hibernation: Pros and Cons

So, hibernation. I'm a fan. I'm not saying people should actually sleep through the winter. I just think more things should be optional in the winter. Like my job. My preferred library winter hours would be M-TH 10-3. Other establishments should also be open during those hours. Establishments where I can purchase winter squashes to eat while I'm hunkered down in my house reading. Businesses that will take me to the airport so I can escape to tropical locations. Airports. Hospitals. Post offices. This form of hibernation would benefit the entire community, because fewer people would be wandering around outside getting into car accidents.

Hibernation Pros
1. Fewer car accidents.
2. Fewer illnesses. (Yesterday a woman came to the reference desk, coughed all over herself, me, the desk, and some small children wandering by, and then asked me to come help with her computer, also now covered in her germs. If you're sick, stay home! You're just giving other people your cooties.)
3. More happiness.
4. People I love would actually receive Christmas presents, because I'd have time to stay home and finish making the gifts I started working on in March and have suddenly realized should be done by now but aren't because all my time is spent scraping off my car and looking for my scarf.

Hibernation Cons
There are no cons. This is a brilliant plan. If you're some kind of weird, masochistic, winter-lover, you're still welcome to go outside and work and slide around in the snow and get colds. I'll be inside baking bread and learning to play the harmonica.

4 comments:

Amy said...

So your hibernation plan doesn't exactly seem to focus on long periods of sleep. More like long periods of doing-whatever-the-heck-you-want indoors. Hmmm. . . I like it. Yes, we're in.

Anonymous said...

I'm writing you in for president.

MBC said...

Amy--I'm glad to see you've caught the vision. I just don't think people should be pushed out into a frozen world.

Emily--Thank you.

Ann-Marie said...

where do i sign?

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