Gems From The Bairn

Fruit flies were swarming some leftover apple on a plate at our table and they were distressing The Bairn.  He flung out his arms and announced, "I am a scarecrow of bugs." 

He still has a few strange turns of phrase.  My favorites are

I am interested of  _____ (bugs, lightning, etc.)

and

I will pull up it

There's a dead raccoon on the side of the road a few houses down from us.  The Bairn's very concerned about it and wants to take it to its home, although it's been there so long that it's now almost unrecognizable as an animal.  A few weeks ago we passed it in the stroller while talking about Halloween decorations that are full of air.  "Maybe we could pump that raccoon full of air and make it better," The Bairn suggested.

He doesn't really understand death, which is probably why he calls the gravestones we pass mate-o-malts.  His own word that he came up with himself.